The Girl With the Red Licorice Smile (poem)

The Girl With the Red Licorice Smile

1+1=2, 2+2=4, 3+3=6
I am bigger than the lamp in the corner
That shines all alone like the great ball of fire in the sky
I repeat these facts over and over
I sit on the floor cluttered with stars

In the next room a girl with blonde hair, brown eyes laughs
Not a care in the world
She talks with her friends
Not a moment to spare
There are so many
Every word gobbled up in seconds by friends...
I have two
One four years younger
The other sixty years older
What it must be like to have people your age care

Love is just a mixture of chemicals, nothing more
The past can not be changed
Reasoning and logic hold me together
But just like hydrogen bonds
Sometimes a stone is weak and falls from the blockaide

Warm salty rain droplets slide down my cheeks...
4+4=8, 5+5=10, 6+6=12

I hear another giggle
Through the paper thin walls of this old house with the creaks
I must leave before my wall becomes the Berlin wall
My feet pound the gravel
Crunch... crunch.. crunch. crunch
Faster and faster
The cold November air burns in my lungs

Just as I think I've made it
The avalanche races after me
I ran faster but it's too late
The cold flames gnaw at my soul

"She's fun" "You're too serious"
Their words nibble on my brain
They want me to be like the blonde haired, brown eyed girl
I grew up, I saw what had to be done
I saw the steel reality and I knew what I had to do
I knew my future
One without emotions
One gray as the grayest grays
The word fun does not fit
And love does not belong
For that would take my away from what needs done

No one truly knows the dark depths of my soul
I think back to boy with the fluffy hair
Who can come so close to seeing my blackest black
But still says no one is that black
Especially not the girl with the shining emerald eyes 
And red licorice smile
Like I said almost

If I continue down this emotional path I'll be lost forever
So I slowly rebuild my icy exterior
Hopefully this one won't crack
7+7=14, 8+8=16, 9+9=18

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